...in thankful thursday

today I am thankful for...

113. our new house! God has provided a great opportunity for us to have our own home and I am so very thankful for that....something we have prayed for for a very long time.
114. Sydney's curiosity. She asks a lot of questions....hope my answers will suffice ;)
115. the weather on Tuesday was AWESOME (finally!), even if it didn't last
116. time to sit and be quiet, needed that today.
117. our new kitty, Lily. It's fun having a pet, why did we wait so long?? :)
118. the lesson of trust God continues to teach me. It feels like a never ending lesson, but He presses on with me, not giving up or letting me give up. I'm so thankful for His persistence and faithfulness.
119. Josh's perseverance in a job he doesn't love, but keeps to provide for us
120. chocolate cake....I need to be less thankful for this one ;)
121. fingernail polish. love a little color on my super pale hands....makes it feel springy even when it doesn't look it outside
122. the way that God is using BSF to challenge and stretch me
123. my family...near and far
124. medicine that will hopefully get some of my stomach issues under control
125.  knowing that I have a faithful Heavenly Father, that has prepared His kingdom for those who believe in him and longs for all of us to be there.
"Then the King will say to those on his right, ‘Come, you who are blessed by my Father; take your inheritance, the kingdom prepared for you since the creation of the world."     Matthew 25:34



^"Enter his gates with thanksgiving and his courts with praise; give thanks to him and praise his name. For the Lord is good and his love endures forever; his faithfulness continues through all generations." Psalm 100:4-5

...in being still.

I last posted three months ago about choosing the phrase "be still" for 2014, and boy has God been teaching me how to do that. I think that was a perfect phrase to focus on in this season of my life and has been very stretching, refining, and grounding for me. In January, I feel like I was forced to physically be still. We had ridiculously cold weather which made even going outside painful and the whole family had the flu over the course of 3 weeks. January was a time to literally stop and be. As frustrating and boring as that was at times, it was also a good time of rest which apparently we all needed. February was a time of being still mentally. The weather continued to give us cabin fever, so this mama had to get really creative with our time stuck inside. February was a challenge in so many ways and I feel like God really used that month to quiet my mind and my heart, to see a bit more clearly. March has been a sweet time of being still spiritually. I think studying the book of Matthew this year in BSF has made me think a LOT about faith and trust in Jesus. The study has encouraged me to participate a little more actively in the season of Lent this year which has been super challenging but very fruitful. For lent I chose to fast from a couple different things but also to write in a prayer journal daily. Having that focused time in tangible prayer has had an amazing impact on my days. I've seen it totally change my attitude or focus throughout the day. I've felt the enemy press in and try to steal that peace and joy from my concentrated time of fellowship with God. I've seen answer to prayer and a felt my heart begin to change. I've come face to face with my own selfishness, self-reliance, and self-seeking approach to my relationship with God. I've gained a deeper respect and appreciation for the unreal sacrifice of Christ. I've developed a deeper desire to know Him, trust Him, and love Him better. March was a time of being still in the presence of God....and it has been so good, yet so hard. I read this quote about Lent that really resonated...
"Lent is preparing the heart for Easter. Like going with Jesus into the wilderness for forty days, that we might come face to ugly face with our enemy. Our sacrificing that we might become like Christ in His sacrifice."    Ann Voskamp
That is what this Lent has been for me....coming face to ugly face with our enemy...and sometimes coming face to ugly face with the ugly side of myself.

Thank you God for the reminder to be still. Thank you for the many ways you are teaching me to do that. I pray you will continue to teach me to be still, in all things.


This song has had a huge impact on me the last few weeks. It has sort of stopped me in my tracks, so to speak, and helped me to be still before God as I learn to trust Him more, to have more faith in Him, to love Him better.

just be still.





Several months ago I read this post on another blog about choosing one word to focus on for the entire year. I think this is a brilliant idea. I love simplifying things and focusing on goals...it helps keep me grounded. So after reading that, I began to pray for a word or a phrase to focus on for 2014 and after awhile I began to have one phrase laid on my heart, over and over. Simply...be still.



photo credit
 

So that is my phrase for 2014. I want to be still this year. I want to be quiet, to stand firm and fixed, I want to be at peace, I want to rest. I want to be still in my marriage, to listen more than I speak, to bring peace and rest instead of worry or stress. I want to be still as a parent, to be a place of rest, a mom of peace, quiet and calm. I want to be still in my home, to be the calm in the storm and a fixed place my family can rely on. I want to be still in prayer so that I can hear my Father speak to me. I want to be still in my comings and goings so that I can be more present, every day.  This year, I choose to be still.
Its funny because "be still" is a phrase my grandma used to say to us when we were acting up or getting a little out of control. I've thought about that a lot as I've meditated on this phrase and can kind of see why God led me in this direction. I tend to be an anxious person. I worry, I over-plan, I stress, I anticipate. So now, I need to learn how to just be still.

"Moses answered the people, “Do not be afraid. Stand firm and you will see the deliverance the Lord will bring you today. The Egyptians you see today you will never see again. The Lord will fight for you; you need only to be still.”        Exodus 14:13-14

“Now then, stand still and see this great thing the Lord is about to do before your eyes!"
1 Samuel 12:16

"Be still before the Lord and wait patiently for him; do not fret when people succeed in their ways,   when they carry out their wicked schemes. Refrain from anger and turn from wrath; do not fret—it leads only to evil. For those who are evil will be destroyed, but those who hope in the Lord will inherit the land."           Psalm 37:7-9

^"He says, “Be still, and know that I am God; I will be exalted among the nations, I will be exalted in the earth.”                    Psalm 46:10

"The Lord is gracious and righteous; our God is full of compassion.  The Lord protects the unwary;  when I was brought low, he saved me. Return to your rest, my soul, for the Lord has been good to you."                      Psalm 116:5-7

"Be still before the Lord, all mankind, because he has roused himself from his holy dwelling.”
Zechariah 2:13

"God has told his people, “Here is a place of rest; let the weary rest here. This is a place of quiet rest.”                  Isaiah 28:12a

"This is what the Sovereign Lord, the Holy One of Israel, says: “In repentance and rest is your salvation, in quietness and trust is your strength"                 Isaiah 30:15a


Father, teach me how to be still. Let my heart be still. Let my mind be still.

...in thankful tuesday!

I missed last week, so I thought I'd make up for it by doing this week early. I've got to be honest and say last week I was struggling with being thankful...blinded by wants or needs and overlooking what I've been richly blessed with already. God's definitely working in my heart in that area. So, I am thankful for...

101. a Heavenly Father that is persistent in loving and growing us.
102. a super fun time at the pumpkin patch last weekend. The kids loved it and it was fun to do something fall-ish.
103. our home. I don't love a lot about this house. And I don't love renting. BUT, I am very thankful for a home that has more than enough space for us, that is close to Sydney's school and soccer, that allows for easy walks around the neighborhood, and it's been the longest we've lived in any one place our whole marriage!
104. our van. Despite the fact that the auto door keeps malfunctioning when I pick Sydney up at school and I see 100 other gold Honda vans everywhere I go, our van has been VERY good to us the last 2 years and I am VERY thankful for it!
105. going away this weekend! Josh's work has gifted us a weekend away and we're taking it! We're heading down near Cincinnati and we're going to relax, explore, and see what the weekend brings :)
106. Pumpkin spice coffee creamer....it's amazing.
107. Popcorn! (did you know that you can microwave regular popcorn in a brown paper bag?? You can and it's easy, delicious, and WAAAAAAY better for you than store bought microwave popcorn)
108. weekends full of plans ahead of us....lots of family visits and traveling fun!!
109. that we've managed to survive almost 6 years of Sydney's early childhood with no major injuries (I have a feeling Miles will be a different story ;)
110. watching The Big Bang Theory episodes online....that show makes me laugh out loud :)
111. listening to Miles talk...it's the cutest thing ever.
112. our BSF lesson this week. We're studying Matthew 5 and it has been very challenging and stretching (in a great way) and I'm super excited to hear the lecture on Thursday and learn even more!!


^"Enter his gates with thanksgiving and his courts with praise; give thanks to him and praise his name. For the Lord is good and his love endures forever; his faithfulness continues through all generations." Psalm 100:4-5

...in thankful thursday

I am thankful for...

87. a great visit with my dad last weekend
88. a weekend full of fantastic food (good BBQ and my dad's fish!)
89. little moments that make my kiddos smile and laugh
90. good one on one time with Miles while Sydney is at school
91. good one on one time with Sydney when Miles is napping on non school days
92. watching Sydney learn more each week about letters, numbers, and the beginning stages of reading
93. that Sydney met a HUGE goal and we get to go shopping for a new bike this weekend as her reward
94. Miles' new fake laugh...he just taught himself that this weekend and it's so weird and hilarious
95. a working washer and dryer because I have done A LOT of laundry the past few days and I'm thankful I have a way to do it quickly and easily
96. seeing all the fall decor on peoples homes and porches...I love fall!!
97. the lessons about obedience that I'm learning in my BSF study of Matthew
98. another week to wear flip flops....love me some fall weather, but I hate when I have to wear shoes :(
99. reconciled and restored relationships....God is so good to give us such a great example of grace, forgiveness, mercy, and love
100. that I serve and worship a God who...
 KNOWS me: Psalm 139:1-6
 LOVES me : Romans 8:37-39
 SEES me: Genesis 16:13
 is WITH me: Isaiah 43:1-2
 FORGIVES me: Ephesians 1:7


^"Enter his gates with thanksgiving and his courts with praise; give thanks to him and praise his name. For the Lord is good and his love endures forever; his faithfulness continues through all generations." Psalm 100:4-5

...in thankful thursday

I'm thankful for...

75. chinese takeout General Tso's chicken (had it for dinner and it was YUMMY)
76. a working furnace (ours was out for a bit of the new chilly nights)
77. $1 iced coffees from McDonald's through September....I've gotten too many!
78. Miles' ever growing vocabulary. He's been talking so much! I love the toddler stage! (minus the tantrums :)
79. that I married my best friend who is a great listener and extremely supportive.
80. that my dad is coming to visit tomorrow!
81. that Sydney made Honor Squad!!
82. all that God is teaching me about trust and obedience through our study of Matthew in BSF
83. that Grey's Anatomy and Parenthood premiere tonight...wahooo!
84. days where you can wear both a sweater and flip flops!!
85. a day that had a rough start, but a very productive middle, and a very relaxing end
86. that "...the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your (my) hearts and minds in Christ Jesus" Philippians 4:7

^"Enter his gates with thanksgiving and his courts with praise; give thanks to him and praise his name. For the Lord is good and his love endures forever; his faithfulness continues through all generations." Psalm 100:4-5

...in thankful thursday (on friday :)

I'm thankful for....

63. getting through another extremely busy week
64. that positive goals to work toward are helping Sydney get through a couple issues
65. cool evenings, hoodies, blankets...all signs of fall!!!
66. watching Sydney play soccer....what is cuter than 5 year olds running around trying to play soccer? :)
67. chocolate cake in a mug....(click here for a good recipe)
68. all the fun pumpkin foods that are out right now...pumpkin cream cheese, pumpkin yogurt, pumpkin muffins, oh my!!
69. time to catch up with a dear friend, time to encourage one another and celebrate with one another
70. my brother, who despite our 11 year age difference is one of my favorite friends/people
71. that the new season of Homeland starts next week, woohoo!
72. a weekend with NO plans!
73.that I'm already learning and being challenged through BSF's study of Matthew (learn more here)
74. time to stop, reflect, and enjoy the quiet of the day :)



^"Enter his gates with thanksgiving and his courts with praise; give thanks to him and praise his name. For the Lord is good and his love endures forever; his faithfulness continues through all generations." Psalm 100:4-5

...in thankful thursday

I'm thankful for....

52. an extremely quiet house during Miles' nap time on a school day
53. insurance to go to the doctor and get medicine without worry
54. hot fudge sundaes (really just the hot fudge, I could do without the ice cream ;)
55. that BSF started today!!  (Awesome international Bible Study! We're studying Matthew this year and I'm super excited to see what the year holds for our group!)
56. for giant golf umbrellas....because Miles and I had a long trek to the church for BSF from the back of the parking lot in the pouring rain!
57. iced coffee on the way home. (Have I mentioned my love for coffee? ;)
58. warm, dry clothes to change in to after a soppy trek back to the van and wet ride home
59. Sydney's helpfulness and flexibility
60. Josh's supportive encouragement
61. time last week to go help my mom at my grandma's house
62. God's mercies that are new every morning


^"Enter his gates with thanksgiving and his courts with praise; give thanks to him and praise his name. For the Lord is good and his love endures forever; his faithfulness continues through all generations." Psalm 100:4-5

...in change

I don't like change. As long as I can remember change, transition, and unknowns have be a serious point of anxiety for me. Now, I don't mind small changes like a blip in our plans or a different kind of peanut butter. It's the big ones that rock my core....like having something that was ALWAYS there be gone forever. That has been my past couple of weeks.
My mom has recently moved my grandma into a nursing home. This was a much needed move for my grandma's well being and although difficult, definitely the right thing to do. With this big change (which in and of itself is unsettling) means the cleaning out and selling of my grandma's house. This is obviously a natural part of people in our lives growing older and something that just needs to be done. However, for me, this is life altering. Now let me take a few steps back to clarify why this is such a HUGE deal.
It's a big deal for three reasons...
1. My grandma is incredibly special to me. She loves her home (as we all do) and didn't want to leave it. Her leaving means me never getting to spend time with her there, in her environment. That's kind of impossible for me to comprehend. Her home is special because she is special.
2. My grandma has lived in this house for 60+ years. In my 33 years, nothing has changed in this house...not one thing. Maybe a new chair has found it's way in, or we rearranged the couch a couple times, but that is it. The pictures on the wall have always been there. She's always kept the tea on the same pull out drawer in the lower left cabinet. The same decor has graced the bathroom, bedroom, kitchen and living room. The white room has always been the "kids" room. The carpet shows the wear of our many walks from one end of the house to the other. Her home has remained unchanged for as long as I have known it. To me, it has been the epitome of stability.
3. It's the only true home I've ever known. We moved around a lot when I was a kid and I've moved around a lot as an adult. My grandma's house has always been home base. I spent much of my childhood there. In a lot of ways I grew up there. I would even say that the majority of my great childhood memories are there....many new years eves with a snack table laid out by grandma and pots and pans banged on her porch, many easter egg hunts and pictures in our dresses with our new stuffed bunnies, many halloweens with our costumes ready to trick or treat in her neighborhood, many times of climbing her tree or playing in the nearby circle cul de sac, many times of decorating her christmas tree, many listens of the Sound of Music soundtrack on her record player, many sleepover nights and watching Golden Girls with grandma on the couch, many trips up to explore in the attic, many great family times in the family room and games played at the dinning room table, many great meals cooked in the kitchen, MANY great memories in every nook and cranny of that house. And even as an adult after going through a tough time, it was where Josh, Sydney and I lived for a few months until we got back on our feet. It's where Sydney was potty trained. It's where she has spent the last few Christmas mornings and birthdays. It's where her special room is. My grandma's home is a place of feeling safe, at home, comfortable, known and loved.

A couple weeks ago, my mom took on the daunting task of beginning to pack up and clean out my grandma's house. I went for a day last weekend to help and to choose some things of grandma's that I wanted. I walked in to a house in shambles, boxes everywhere, walls bare. It was one of the toughest days I've had in a long time. There is a for sale sign in the yard and the first offer came in only days after that was put up. The stress and sadness of watching this home disappear, that I have loved so dearly, is wearing on me big time. Now I know it's just a house, but it represents all the security and stability I have ever known. It is my heart's earthly home.

Now, I don't know yet how to find the good in this change. I'm working on that. The only good I'm finding is a strong appreciation for the home my grandma provided my mom and my siblings and my family for many many years. There is good in all the memories there. And I'm so very grateful that I still have the cornerstone of that home, my amazing grandma, to enjoy for what I hope is a very long time.

Heavenly Father, thank you for my grandma's home.
Thank you Lord for the promise of an eternal home...
"For we know that if the earthly tent we live in is destroyed, we have a building from God, an eternal house in heaven, not built by human hands." 2 Corinthians 5:1
"But our citizenship is in heaven. And we eagerly await a Savior from there, the Lord Jesus Christ,  who, by the power that enables him to bring everything under his control, will transform our lowly bodies so that they will be like his glorious body" Philippians 3:20-21
Thank you for the gift of knowing stability and love in my grandma's home and what my grandma and her home have taught me about consistency and steadfastness...
"Every good and perfect gift is from above, coming down from the Father of the heavenly lights, who does not change like shifting shadows. " James 1:17
" Jesus Christ is the same yesterday and today and forever." Hebrews 13:8
"I the Lord do not change. So you, the descendants of Jacob, are not destroyed." Malachi 3:6
"In the beginning you laid the foundations of the earth, and the heavens are the work of your hands. They will perish, but you remain; they will all wear out like a garment. Like clothing you will change them and they will be discarded. But you remain the same, and your years will never end" Psalm 102:25-27
"Who is like you, Lord God Almighty? You, Lord, are mighty, and your faithfulness surrounds you."  Psalm 89:8

...in thankful thursday

today I am thankful for...

42. Sydney's bravery in embracing her first day of kindergarten (today!) with joy and excitement!

43. that I didn't cry when we dropped her off! (was able to make it home for that :)

44. Miles' nap time, and a bit of peace and quiet to digest the big events of the day.

45. iced coffee from Tim Hortons...they make it JUST right :)

46. God's promise that He goes WITH us 

47. that there is finally an opening for my Grandma to go to the nursing home of my mom's preference. It's not going to be an easy transition, but definitely time for it :(

48. flat irons on humid days....or my hair would be pretty crazy ;)

49. people who love me and who are thoughtful

50. a husband that can listen, support, and let me cry over silly things without making me feel silly

51. that school is not every day and we have a break before I have to do this again ;)

^"Enter his gates with thanksgiving and his courts with praise; give thanks to him and praise his name. For the Lord is good and his love endures forever; his faithfulness continues through all generations."  Psalm 100:4-5

...in rest

A couple weeks ago I talked here about finding the good in the quiet. This has introduced a new normal for my morning that I honestly don't know how I ever lived without. I've been doing this every week day for the last couple of weeks, but letting myself sleep in on Saturday and Sunday with the intention of keeping them more laid back days. It's pretty ironic because the last two Saturday's I have been able to really sleep in (this Saturday it was until 8:30!) and yet I've been SO exhausted and just flat out cranky all day. It really got to me this last weekend. I thought I was giving myself a break and time to rest, but I felt the very opposite of rested.

I thought about it a lot through the weekend, about what rest means. Today it just hit me: Rest, for me, is not the act of being physically still or relaxed. Rest, for me, is the absence of anxiety, worry, stress, and fear. If you look up "rest" on dictionary.com, the 3rd definition says: relief or freedom, especially from anything that wearies, troubles, or disturbs. YES, this is the rest I am in need of daily, the rest that is crucial: freedom from anything that troubles. When I start my day off with time alone with God, that time is completely free of all worry, all stress, all fear. It's just me and my God and His truth that reminds me of who He is and who He says I am. It gives me perspective for the whole day. For me rest is not found in sleep, rest is found in the quiet time of reflection on what is true. It is GOOD to find rest, to dwell in it, to soak it up, and to go back for it again and again.

 "Find rest, O my soul, in God alone; my hope comes from him. He alone is my rock and my salvation; he is my fortress, I will not be shaken. My salvation and my honor depend on God; he is my mighty rock, my refuge. Trust in him at all times, O people; pour out your hearts to him, for God is our refuge."   Psalm 62:5-8

“Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest.  Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls.  For my yoke is easy and my burden is light."  Matthew 11:28-30

...in thankful thursday (on friday :) )

We had my daughter's kindergarten open house last night which consumed my thoughts all day and evening, so thankful thursday was forgotten :( But let's do a belated one because I could use a little thankfulness today...

I am thankful for...

29. the opportunity for Sydney to put a face to her teacher's name, that she's excited and liked her teacher, and that she got to meet her locker buddy on the playground after open house :)
30. knowing, that even in the midst of my anxiety over Syd going to school, that God is GOOD, that He goes WITH her, that He LOVES her and He will walk with me through this new stage of parenting
31.  awesome weather to do fun things outside this week (including a super fun day at the zoo!)
32. Josh's job. Even though it's a bit unpredictable and gives him a good amount of frustration...I'm thankful that he has it, that it provides opportunity for a future in the company, and that he has already been recognized and appreciated for his hard work.
33. cool evenings...I don't want to wish summer away but I LOVE fall and cool evenings are just a sign of its impending arrival!!
34. God's provision....I may have said it here before it but it blows me away where we are now compared to a year ago. Don't get me wrong...we are not any kind of wealthy by any stretch, but we are in a much better place with much less anxiety over how the next bill will get paid. God has provided our every need when we had little and now is providing "wants" as we have a bit more. I'm so thankful for His provision and KNOW that all I have belongs to Him!
35. answered prayers!! I have had the great privilege to pray for people I love and have seen two awesome answers to prayer this week. So thankful to be allowed a peak at what God is doing in other's hearts and lives!
36. Miles' new found communication skills. In the last month, Miles has grown leaps and bounds in his ability to understand us and respond using words. I LOVE the toddler stage and this has been SO fun!
37. the love my kids have for each other. I hope they always love each other this much :)
38. chocolate that tastes like coffee...I mean seriously that's just ridiculously awesome.
39. saving money! we were able to cut down our cable bill this week and I'm always saving with my awesome couponing skills ;)
40. flexible days...now I say this knowing that they are soon to be a thing of the past (once school starts) but for today I am thankful that we can go with the flow :)
41. the days I don't have laundry to fold :)

^"Enter his gates with thanksgiving and his courts with praise; give thanks to him and praise his name. For the Lord is good and his love endures forever; his faithfulness continues through all generations."  Psalm 100:4-5

...in music

God has always used music to speak to me. This particular song has popped up on my Pandora radio a couple times, but when I heard it yesterday it was like God speaking directly to my heart. It was such a GOOD reminder of who my Almighty God is and the love that He generously gives...

“Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest.  Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls.  For my yoke is easy and my burden is light."  Matthew 11:28-30

"Be strong and courageous. Do not be afraid or terrified because of them, for the Lord your God goes with you; he will never leave you nor forsake you" Deuteronomy 31:6

"For I am the Lord your God who takes hold of your right hand and says to you, Do not fear; I will help you." Isaiah 41:13

...in thankful thursday

The last two weeks have been full. It is GOOD to stop and take time to just be thankful :)

I am thankful for....
15. homemade mac and cheese (We had this with dinner tonight. The first bite was a reminder of why I don't make it...it's. just. too. good!)
16. when Miles is just the right amount of tired that he's super snuggly
17. two more weeks of summer to enjoy with Sydney before school starts.
18. Sydney's excitement for school to begin (because I'm a bit terrified...hopefully her excitement will rub off ;)
19. a great time in PA with Josh's family last weekend, time to see his Grandma, and good time/conversation with my sister-in-law
20. a new bedspread......feels like a bedroom makeover :)
21. finding the right medicine to help with my stomach/digestive issues. I had major reflux and ulcers after having Miles and had months of doctors appointments/tests before I quit it all and tried an all natural supplement. It's kind of been life changing for my stomach!
22. FRIENDS on DVD....that show never gets old (although Josh may argue that ;)
23. good friends (in real life :) that can support one another in prayer
24. the strength and discipline to continue getting up early every morning and spend time alone with my God (I've even bumped it back another 15 minutes!)
25. Lamentations 3:21-26. I studied this last week during my quiet time and it has given me SO much encouragement. I find myself repeating it in my head throughout the day...
"Yet this I call to mind and therefore I have hope: Because of the Lord’s great love we are not consumed, for his compassions never fail. They are new every morning; great is your faithfulness. I say to myself, “The Lord is my portion; therefore I will wait for him.” The Lord is good to those whose hope is in him, to the one who seeks him; it is good to wait quietly for the salvation of the Lord."
26. that I have TRUTH (God's Word) that I can stand on, that I serve an Almighty God who loves me and wants the best for me
27. that my "to do" list actually got accomplished today!! (this is very rare :)
28. that the weekend, with sunshine in it's forecast, is just around the corner :)

 ^"Enter his gates with thanksgiving and his courts with praise; give thanks to him and praise his name. For the Lord is good and his love endures forever; his faithfulness continues through all generations."  Psalm 100:4-5

...in the quiet

My life is busy and loud, as is the life of every mother. The day zips by before I get things done...and yet it drags and bedtime never seems soon enough. Since my hubs has started his job (in November) his work schedule has been unlike that of any other time in our marriage. His days have been LONG which makes our days LONG and last couple weeks it just really caught up with me. I was feeling worn thin. 

God knew this and the last two weeks of sermons at our church have spoken to this deep need within me to get alone with God and get quiet; to remove every distraction in my life and my heart, to trust that even in my complete exhaustion getting up an hour earlier will be JUST what I need, to see that the very thing holding me back from feeling better was valuing feeling better more than I valued making the tough changes to take better care of myself. 

So I did what I was dreading, what felt impossible: I sacrificed an entire hour of sleep. This may not seem like much, but to a mother of little kiddos rest is crucial. As soon as their feet hit the ground, I don't stop moving again until their bedtime. That's a lot of moving. My hubs kept pushing me to try getting up earlier to have that time for myself and for God. (He started it last week and it made a huge difference for him). So today I woke up at 6:30 and had a FULL 40 minutes to myself. I had time to read God's truth, to pray, to journal, to sit and be.

And when my little kiddo got up in his crib and started hollering for "maameeee", I was able to greet him with joy and a full heart instead of tiredness and regret of leaving my pillow so soon. Today was enough convincing for me that this is worth it and I will make it my new normal.

There is GOOD in the quiet. 

"Yet this I call to mind and therefore I have hope: Because of the Lord’s great love we are not consumed, for his compassions never fail. They are new every morning;  great is your faithfulness. I say to myself, “The Lord is my portion; therefore I will wait for him.”The Lord is good to those whose hope is in him, to the one who seeks him; it is good to wait quietly for the salvation of the Lord."     Lamentations 3:21-26

...in thankful thursday

I'm going to continue a tradition I started here on my other blog. This will be an ongoing list of the things I am thankful for. I want to be thankful every day, but I'll take Thursdays to write it down :)

I'm thankful for...

1. first and foremost: my God, my Savior

2. my husband. I love him more each day.

3. my daughter. She is the kindest, funniest girl I know.

4. my son. He is just precious and so sweet.

5. my family and friends, near and far.

6. phones and computers to keep in touch with them!!

7. coffee. Iced, hot, flavored, or plain....I can't go a day without it. Well I guess I could, I just don't want to!! :)

8. sunshine and cool breeze. The last two days have been PERFECT!

9. flip flops. My go to summer foot wear...I'm going to be sad when fall comes and I have to give them up.

10. a new shade of fingernail polish

11. fresh flowers in my kitchen. (especially when I get them free! Caught the lady in the floral department at Kroger right before she was about to pitch some "old" flowers. She gave them to me for free and they still look great days later!!)

12. God's provision. We were in a much different financial place this time last year and it blows me away to look back on how God has provided for every need (and even some wants that weren't needs)

13. A new book to read.

14. how good my kids are in the grocery store. They get complimented often and it's well deserved because they are little shopping troopers! :)

 ^"Enter his gates with thanksgiving and his courts with praise; give thanks to him and praise his name. For the Lord is good and his love endures forever; his faithfulness continues through all generations."  Psalm 100:4-5

...in music.

I LOVE Pandora radio. It has introduced me to some great music that I'm not sure I would have heard otherwise. A couple weeks ago I set out to find some different worship music. I've been listening to the same old stuff for ages and needed something fresh...so I made a Jon Foreman channel (he's great if you haven't heard of him, go take a listen). I knew that if they played something similar to him, it could be good. Through that channel, I found my two new favorite worship bands... Rend Collective Experiment and All Sons and Daughters. . What is especially great about All Sons and Daughters is that it's not just good worship music, it's good MUSIC. I love them. Their music is good for my ears and my heart. Here is a little taste....

 Lord I find You in the seeking
Lord I find You in the doubt
And to know You is to love You
And to know so little else

in all things.

So here I am.

First, let me explain something about myself. I have historically been a whiner. Yep, that's right, I tend to complain about things....a lot. Over the last few years I have been in a season of being refined by God; being changed, remolded and humbled. Part of what I have learned through this process is that my negative attitude is my CHOICE and I can simply choose to change it. I may not be able to change my circumstances or things that have or are happening, but I can always control how I respond. The reaction is always in my hands. Now this has been a hard lesson to learn (and BOY am I still learning it) but it has changed me. It has helped me see that on my horrible, no good, very bad days...I can turn them around!
"The Lord is my strength and shield. I trust him with all my heart. He helps me, and my heart is filled with joy.I burst out in songs of thanksgiving."  Psalm 28:7 NLT ---------   "We demolish arguments and every pretension that sets itself up against the knowledge of God, and we take captive every thought to make it obedient to Christ." 2 Corinthians 10:5
This is not always easy. In fact, it takes being very intentional in my thought process,  my reactions, and my words. It takes trusting GOD over myself, over MY capabilities to make something better. It takes trusting that God is GOOD, regardless of what circumstance I find myself in.
 "Be joyful always; pray continually; give thanks in all circumstances, for this is God’s will for you in Christ Jesus." 1 Thessalonians 5:16-18 -------------  "And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose." Romans 8:28 -----"Search me, God, and know my heart; test me and know my anxious thoughts. See if there is any offensive way in me, and lead me in the way everlasting." Psalm 139:23-24 NIV
By changing my attitude or perspective I am choosing JOY over sadness, PEACE over anxiety, and HOPE over despair. So, this blog is going to serve as challenge to myself to find the good. Sometimes it will be in something I read, a song I heard, something awesome my kids said, a new recipe or coupon deal, a scripture, a quote, or a simple bit of my day that brought a smile. I'm hoping this will keep me focused on being THANKFUL, on keeping my mind and heart focused on TRUTH and things that are GOOD!

Secondly, I learn better and remember longer if I write things down. It's like writing it down presses it into my memory a little deeper. So, this blog will serve as a way to help me remember the GOOD in my day or week. When the negative thoughts come creeping in I will come here and be reminded to choose to see the good.

 

"...whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right,

whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable—

if anything is excellent or praiseworthy—

think about such things.

Whatever you have learned or received or heard from me,

or seen in me—put it into practice.

And the God of peace will be with you."

Philippians 4:8-10 NIV